Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Played all his strokes before he got to the ground


Willowists,

Noted that MJ Clarke had an outstanding tournament at the Twenty20 World Cup.
Pup’s figures speak for themselves:
6 matches, 3 innings, 8 runs, highest score of 5, and the superlative average of 2.66.
Obviously not his format, and the tour selectors appeared to have agreed, by batting him way down the order.
Heaven help the kiddie if he was ever asked to roll his arm over in the super short version of the game – he would be murdered.
Or perhaps the attached photograph with the “busty brunette” might have had something to do with it.
Poor Lara was in tears upon sighting it, according to the Daily Telegraph, so it must be true.
He could quite easily have played all his strokes before he got to the ground.
Twenty20 is no doubt the way of the future.
Knew that from my first encounter with the phenomenon maybe four seasons back now, in the week before Christmas, the NSW squad found themselves with nothing to do, so put together two XI’s for a charity Twenty20 at Hurstville Oval.
The ground was absolutely jammed packed, and dozens of kiddies with baseball mits were parked on the velodrome which runs around the oval to try and catch balls launched over the boundary and claim their prize of a framed signed photograph of the Strayan one-day XI.
Helped too that The Sandman was the ground announcer.
Also remember a very enjoyable afternoon with the children in the Bob Stand at North Sydney Oval [the perfect ground for Twenty20, tiny as it is] two seasons back, when Brad Haddin, I think it was, really got onto one, that was still going up as it left the ground’s perimeter fence, cleared a big stand of Port Jackson fig trees, and as we later learned, came to earth on the steps of a nearby church, narrowly missing clocking a newlywed couple who were being confettied at the time.
Now that’s entertainment.
Perhaps Pup will find more success on this ridiculous tour of India to get underway on the weekend.
Seven one day games -- count ‘em – seven, in seven different cities, over three weeks, with a Twenty20 game to finish off.
There was a little birdie singing a while back that the Strayan players wanted the whole thing called off as a complete joke and outrageous waste of time.
They were told that it was a naked money grubbing exercise to rip off the vast Indian television audience, and that no, it will go ahead.
The test players will miss the first Milk Cup game while in India, and will then return for just the one first class game before they go headlong into the test series against the Sri Lanka.
Now that’s a fantastic preparation for serious cricket, isn’t it?
And what chance have the selectors got?
Given that they are not being called on to tinker around the edges as usual – the chairman and the three wise men have some major league decisions to make, like the small matters of:
Who is going to open the bowling?
Who is going to open the batting?
Who is going to be the slow bowler, if indeed, we need a spinner?
Consider that Australia played its last test match ten months ago and on that occasion the team comprised:
ML Hayden, JL Langer, RT Ponting, MEK Hussey, MJ Clarke, A Symonds, AC Gilchrist, SK Warne, B Lee, SR Clark, GD McGrath.

Craven.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

many years in the football wilderness


Sad Sacks,

Not interested in football anymore.
That said, having worked my through Mad Monday and the debrief with SC Roos, perhaps it’s time for the odd reflection on the season that might have been.
As I’ve been saying for weeks it was a year that was cruelled by injury, with Kennelly and the Ugliest man in Football largely unavailable, and other ageing stars playing on one leg, as it turns out, with the aid of pain killing needles, for much of the year.
Others didn’t make the “best players” list as much as they might have done.
No one really expected the Swans to go past the first week of the finals, did they?
Except perhaps for the team itself who I am reliably informed, had already played the Collingwood game in their heads and were looking towards a rematch with West Coast.
The final was atypical of the whole season…a dreadfully slow start [like having six goals to one kicked on you in the first quarter – how many times did that happen?]...a brave fight back in the second quarter while playing catch up football…a flat championship quarter…and running out of legs towards the finish as the youngsters in opposing sides showed them up for pace.
A cursory look at the Swans roster says to me that some players should just retire now, but probably won’t, as they don’t want to give up the good money and the good life, but certainly, age will catch up with many by the end of 2008 at the very least.
I fear the Swans are now destined for many years in the football wilderness when you look at ages of these blokes:
Spida Everitt 33
Brett Kirk 31
BBB Hall 30
Leo Barry 30
Magic 30
Jared Crouch 29
The Goodes Train 28
C.Bolton 27
Nic Fosdike 27
Nick Davis 27
D.Jolly 27
…and the list goes on….
Tadgh Kennelly will be happy enough to join Jim Stynes in the Pantheon of Irish Footballers Made Good and return to Dublin forever.
Fearfully, I can’t see many youngsters coming through the ranks with the exception of 20-year-old Eddie Barlow, and Teddy Richards, who played every game this season, but the bloke is already 24.
The Swans have never used their draft picks very wisely, and I don’t suppose they are about to start now.
In other words, to remain competitive with the likes of the teams that occupied the top four at the end of this season, over the next couple of years, the Swans will need to buy at least three class backs, a name full-forward, a name ruckman [perhaps two], a name midfielder/ruck rover, and a name centre half forward, all under the age of 25, at the very least!
That’s a very tall order my friends.

I think I have said all I want to say about the Balmain Tigers.

Anyway, The Winter Game wire is now officially closed for the year, you will be pleased to hear!
Thanks for the abuse, comments and suggestions throughout the season.
I’ve enjoyed the ride.
Occasional updates will appear on my website:
http://crazycraves.blogspot.com
Which of course will remain a repository for pertinent remarks on the first class cricket season, if you are interested.
Bring on the thwack of willow of leather, I say!

COLLINGWOOD: 6.5, 8.9, 13.12, 18.17 (125). Goals: Rocca 6, Cloke 3, Rusling 3, Buckley, Davis, Didak, Medhurst, Pendlebury, Swan
SYDNEY: 1.4, 7.5, 9.8, 13.9 (87). Goals: O'Loughlin 4, N.Davis 2, Malceski 2, J.Bolton, Fosdike, Hall, Kirk, Schneider
At Melbourne Cricket Ground.
Crowd: 64,645

Craven.

get in touch with this Michael Clarke

This Michael Clarke….

http://www.theage.com.au/news/Sport/Clarke-to-miss-Twenty20-practice-matches/2007/09/08/1188783552642.html

should get in touch with this Michael Clarke…

http://www.zwire.com/site/tab5.cfm?newsid=18804671&BRD=2553&PAG=461&dept_id=506096&rfi=6

might have a cure for a strained beer gut…

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

A right spanking





Handing out a 12 goal football lesson to a previously in-form side is not a bad way to start September!
It was really game over by quarter time, and certainly mid way through the second stanza, as the Swans cut a swathe through the Hawks defence that had turned up after having popped one too many Mogadon’s
Very satisfying to see Lewis Roberts-Thompson aka The Ugliest Man In Football back on the paddock after entire year out.
UMIF had a solid, if unspectacular game, but what more can you expect from a bloke seriously short of match practice?
Thought young Ed Barlow had an excellent match throughout.
The kiddie has a bright future in front of him for mine, and ironically, there may not be room for him in the side in the first week of the finals.
With Hall having a little rest to sort his niggles, the Swans mid-field and forwards set up had a virtually free reign from SC Roos as evinced by the number of goal kickers…count ‘em…twelve in all!!
At one stage I think the television commentators said that UMIF was the only bloods man on the field who had not kicked at least one goal this season.
In fact, at one stage during the second quarter here was the weird sight of UMIF and Malceski running through the half forward line.
The Goodes train was very good for three of the four quarters, while Magic had probably had his best game of the season, with a goal in each quarter.
The last goal of the game from Magic was a top candidate for ‘goal of the season’ as he had the ball on the customary string, evaded four or five defenders, to find himself with both feet over the goal line in the behind area while still managing to keep the ball in play, then recovering to kick a snap at 90 degrees and boot the goal from about two yards out!
Magic indeed.
Nick Davis Come To Save Us managed to get some mud on him with four choice goals, while Spida did some very useful work in the ruck, however who could believe that Along Came A Schneider fail to kick a major in a 22 goal rout like that?
Would have had his pay docked, yet again, by the Match Committee
What all this means for the cauldron that is finals is anyone’s guess.
You’d expect the Hawks, if they turned up like that again, would be pretty quickly towelled up by the Crows.
And on that form, you’d expect that Swans would give the ‘Pies a right a spanking at the home of he Grand Final, and go all the way to boot, from 7th.
But who knows?
There’s not much for Sydney to learn from that game, and September is an entirely different kettle of fish to the regular season.
As my position on the national AFL tipping ladder suggests [107,122 out of 164,688 tippers!] couldn’t tip football to save my life, so don’t come to me looking to make any predictions, more likely to put the mock on someone or another.


SYDNEY: 5.6,14.8, 18.8, 22.9 (141). Goals: Davis 4, O'Loughlin 4, O'Keefe 3, Bevan, Mathews, Crouch 2, Goodes, Richards, Ablett, Malceske 2, Barlow, McVeigh
HAWTHORN: 1.2, 3.3, 9.5, 10.9 (69). Goals: Dixon 2, Boyle, Ladson, Hodge, Brown, Roughhead, Taylor.
At Sydney Cricket Ground.
Crowd: 27,498.

NB: As my home computer is broken for the time being this has not gone out on The Winter Game e-mail circuit as yet.

Friday, August 31, 2007

ruined it for everyone



Fellow tragics.

How could it have come to this?
Labelled the Tigers as the heart break team of the season a few weeks back and impossible to follow, and how right did that prove to be.
With an early start on Saturday, went to bed at a12-4 at half time confident that the two premiership points were in the bag
However, the fishwraps suggest Johnny Morris lost the ball in a one-on-one strip with 12 second left on the clock and the scores all tied up.
Newcastle quickly saw the opportunity to draw the penalty and ran on into a Balmain defensive line who were all offside by a country mile.
The ball sails over the Newcastle cross bar, and it’s game, set, match, season over.
The Tigers this season have become masters at contriving yet another way to lose an unloseable match
And of all the teams to get your season done it by…it had to be the hopeless, hapless drug-addled Knights, didn’t it.
A dark day indeed.
As a colleague at work succinctly exclaimed: “Bloody Balmain. They’ve gone and ruined it for everyone”.
If I were the coach I would have given each and every player individually a gigantic tusk up the runter nd tell them to get out of my sight before I killed them.
But no such histrionics from SC Sheens as indicated by this word for word quote as seen on Sky News Straya.
“We’ve come up short. It’s been our season for most of the year, we’ve been up and down. We had our chance to win it, and didn’t. Congratulations to Newcastle, and y’know, commiserations to us. Just got to work harder for next season and that’s just about it. There’s not much else we can say”. I suppose he apologised to the fans after the Debacle at Leichhardt, so there’s little point in doing so again.
A more comprehensive season review to follow after I’ve had a chance to join SC Sheens and the boys for Mad Monday to ponderwhat might have been, but at the moment I’m just too upset.
TIGERS 24. Tries: Marshall (2), Morris, Lawrence. Goals: Marshall (4)
KNIGHTS 26. Tries: Vuna (2), Paterson, Gidley. Goals: Gidley (5)
At Stadium Australia, Homebush.
Crowd: 13,446.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

The Room Full of Mirrors down on Balmain Road







Fellow disappointees,

Had to park about ten minutes walk further away from the ground than usual due to the huge crowd who were already in, and just as we were getting out of the car, a red Ferrari flashed by.
Turned out to be a good omen for later in the night, but not for the afternoon!
As we were walking along the foreshore we spied a Tigers fan who was putting his chairs and esky into his boot, while his family were getting in the car.
“What’s the matter mate, couldn’t get in?”
Oh no, the bloke explained, they had been in the ground for quite a while before the sardine effect came into play, and he found it was just far too uncomfortable and his view of the playing arena had become obstructed, so he decided to pack up and leave; “rather watch the game on television in the comfort of my own lounge room, thanks mate”
Thought the bloke was mad at the time, but as it turned out, he made an excellent decision.
The very steep hill you have to climb to get up to the Mary St entrance to Leichhardt Oval has taken its toll on many a punter over the years, but spotted a Souths fan barely struggling up the incline with a very wobbly boot on.
When we got to the top we saw the same Rabbitoh’s supporter had fallen over between two parked cars, and due to his paralytic state, was unable to get up again.
A couple of security guards were yelling at him “just keep still mate! just keep still! who are you with? who are you with?”
His mates eventually twigged as to what had happened, went back over and picked him up, and with his arms draped over the shoulders of two blokes, the dead drunk was admitted to the ground.
No problem.
Oh dear.
As we were waiting to be admitted, noticed a gate attendant tearing the stubs off a whole bunch of tickets and dropping them into the box office bin.
[The turnstiles at Leichhardt are so ancient they don’t count the patrons as they go in, and the ticket stubs have to be counted by hand].
The gate attendant loudly announced to the couple as they went through the turnstiles “have a great afternoon with your 12 children”
First hand evidence of crowd figure tampering.
That said, if there weren’t 20,000 in, the joint was still jumpin’ and packed to the rafters with the standing room only crowd on the hill extending way beyond the scoreboard bar [where it usually ends] up to the very back of the hill and then up into the Moreton Bay fig trees!
There were about 50 people on top of the old blokes toilet block, before they were eventually dragged off by the cops.
Most disappointing for everyone concerned that the crowd, as it turned out, had nothing to cheer about, and most disappointing for us to find that we had crap seats.
Right in the very first row between the 20 and 10 metre lines at the southern end – this for buying tickets on the first day they became available?
Can only now assume that most of the concourse area is taken up by Members.
So we had to look through the three strands of wire that top the fence there [presumably to prevent ground invasions and players from flipping over the sideline and into the crowd?], but at least we had a good view of the state of the playing surface – accurately described by the ground curator as looking like “the rolling green hills of Ireland”.
A good opening foray from the Tigers was butchered with a silly forward pass with the line wide open, and it was all downhill from there with the Rabbitoh’s garnering a massive weight of possession that would inevitably lead to points on the board.
Hardly saw the ball at all down our end of the field in the first half.
It’s hard to score when you have next to no possession, and the forwards are failing to provide any go forward and subsequent field position, to let the backs do their magic.
Add to that a brittle defensive effort, and the Tiger’s looked like done dinners from the moment Farah went off and never returned.
As we learned later, he had suffered a bad reaction to a pain-killing needle, and lost all feeling in his leg.
So my suspicions the kiddie has been playing injured for several weeks turned out to be right.
Only high point in the game came late in the first stanza, when Benji turned on a bit of trademark brilliance with a kick and regather, and with a jink and a step, found his winger with only the full back to beat.
But at 18-6 down at half-time, things were looking very ominous indeed.
Especially as the grand stand bar had by then run out of Carlton Draught, and could only offer luke cold VB.
With all the tackling required in the first half, the Tigers had had the stuffing well and truly knocked out of them, and it was only a matter of time before the floodgates opened for Souths.
Tigers fans voted with their feet about fifteen minutes into the second half as hundreds of them began pouring off the hill and making their way for the exits, declining to take the torture anymore.
Must be very demoralising for a team to see that, knowing that your fans had given up on you.
Taniela Tuiaki had a lovely game, but he was a shining light in an otherwise awful display.
The long and the short of it was that they just didn’t turn up to play.
About ten minutes before full time a most unusual thing was observed – a full can of beer thrown onto the ground from the Latchem Robinson stand into a huddle of Souths players right in front of us after they had scored yet another try.
The cops quickly moved in and threw out the perpetrator.
Would have thought it was just a case of the frustration boiling right over rather than anything really malicious.
On interview after the game SC Sheens was moved to apologise to the fans – and so he should.
“We've taken what was going to be our own destiny today, and we've blown it. It's very disappointing, 20 minutes before fulltime, to see people leaving. On behalf of the team, I apologise for that. We were embarrassed by it”
From talk of a home final just a few weeks back, the Tigers have now got themselves into a terrible pickle.
You would have thought they could beat the next-to-last placed Newcastle next Friday night, but then they have to rely on Parramatta beating Brisbane just to squeeze into the eight.
But on that performance, they will go nowhere in September.
As the sun started to set on Leichhardt, we lingered a while, pondering what went wrong.
The old wags in the scoreboard, at least, had a sense of humour with a sense of history.
They took down all the numbers from the Souths side of the scoreboard, left the tries and goals up on the Tigers side, and then dropped the numbers 5 & 2 into the score frame, so to anyone who had not seen the game, it would have looked like the Tigers had won 52-0.
If only.

WESTS TIGERS 12 Tries: Fitzhenry, Tuiaki. Goals: Marshall (2).
SOUTH SYDNEY RABBITOHS 37 Tries: Gordon (2), Yileen, Sutton, J.Smith, Dean, Asotasi. Goals: Williams (6). Field Goals: Williams (1).
At Leichhardt Oval.
Crowd: 20,232



What can you say about the rubbish trotted out by the Swans at The Home of the Grand Final on Saturday night?
The less said the better, for mine.
Again, a season cruelled by injury; no Kennelly, no Ball, no Ugliest Man in Football, leaving the defence in a state of considerable disarray.
Luke Brennan appeared to be entirely out of his depth, and ended up injured anyway.
It was sickening to see Magic land heavily on his back while taking a mark, and then appearing to cough up blood before being ushered off the ground by the Bamfords.
Buchanan, the fool, is looking at being rubbed out for about three weeks for mine, for a very crude late hit in the final quarter.
That brain explosion epitomized what had been going on, really.
Collingwood played a very clever Championship quarter, winning it three goals to one, and there was really never any practical chance of coming back from there.
In an irony of ironies, The Goods Train was undoubtedly best on ground in a losing team and would have collected the maximum Brownlow votes to add to the meager handful he would have gathered this season.
From my reading of the premiership table, the Swans will still make the eight, even if they go down to the Hawks next Sunday, but top four was done in [probably well before] by last week’s draw, and any hopes of another flag have evaporated in the fierce Melbourne sun.
Will probably end up playing Geelong again at Kardinia Park in the first week of the finals!
There would have been much scratching of heads and chins at the Sunday morning smoko, and you would have thought the first thing SC Roos would have done on return to Sydney would have been to book a session in at The Room Full of Mirrors down on Balmain Road.


COLLINGWOOD: 3.6, 9.8,12.10, 15.11 [101]. Goals: Rusling 4, Rocca 3, Didak, Burns, Clement, Medhurst, Thomas, Pendlebury, Swan, Bryan.
SYDNEY: 4.0, 7.4, 8.6, 11.10 [76]. Goals: Hall 4, Davis 2, Schneider, O’Keefe, Jolly, Kirk, O’Loughlin.
At Melbourne Cricket Ground.
Crowd: 63,842

an appalling state of affairs














Masochists,
What an appalling state of affairs.
You have to wonder about yr commitment.
At least I was among the last to leave Leichhardt Oval.
And the old blokes in the scoreboard had a sense of humor with a sense of history…
Commentary to follow, but in the meantime check the photo’s on the blog…at…
The fans are very dissapointed
I'm here to tell you...there is always next week.