Arachnologists,
A bizzare game of football if ever there was one.
With the brand new flat screen telly in the corner of the loungeroom that had been ordered in just in time for the new footy season firmly locked on to news from the tally room, found myself scrabbling about in the rafters of Dad's Shed fiddling about and adusting the radio aerial to beam in the long range broadcast of the Tiges game.
Football had been bumped off local radio, both ABC and commercial, in favour of election coverage.
Managed to tune into the only option for a continuous call of the rugby league proceedings on the reliable old shed wireless from ABC 612AM Brisbane.
Reception was fairly scratchy through the white noise snow, so brought a portable radio down to the shed and tuned it into the same frequency.
Voila! Bingo! AM Stereo! Brilliant!
Needless to say, it worked a treat.
Well aware that the call was freely available with crystal clear clarity on the net thingy, but this was much more fun.
Maybe it's time to cut the mustard and do a deal to get a digital radio?
No idea who was calling the game, but he did have a nice turn of phrase.
Marshall was making a bustling run being heavily involved in some first-half set-play and the commentator called it thus:
"Marshall! He's busted through one tackle, now he's done another, threw a dummy, stepped in and slipped away from a third tackle, and now a fourth! How about that! He's still going Marshall! Now, he's finally brought down. Fair Dinkum! You'd swear he was covered in spiders."
Forwards laid some solid groundwork, as you'd expect, to give the Great Benji and the other backs room to put on the jink, the step, the weave to good effect and it always looked like it was going to be tries-a-plenty, especially against a Raiders' defence that was put on the back foot one too many times.
The visitors really had no hope after a forward scored a brilliant run away try off his own bat...Mr Andrew Fifita, who's of course built like a Sherman tank, busted the advantage line wide open and found himself in the clear with no visible means of support, with only the full back to beat; cranked up the tracks on the armoured personel carrier, swatted the full back out the way and ran a full 50 metres to plant the ball underneath the black dot.
Magnificent!
Now that's embarrassing for any opposition.
Speaking of complete embarrassment for Marshall; lining up to kick a gimmee goal, only problem was that his kicking boot got in caught the turf and the ball dribbled a few yards off the kicking tee and rolled end on end and went no further, failed even to become airborne.
Joisus.
No further evidence needed viz a viz the urgent need for a new goal kicker!
With the game in the dilly bag, the Try Scoring Freak was stretchered off with ten minutes to go with what keen observers at the ground described as "a shocker".
Turns out the poor bastard had to be taken to the local hospital and given a general anesthetic before they could get five blokes in white coats to jump on him and put his dislocated hip back into place.
Never heard of such an injury before, but was always bound to be very bad.
With Lawrence gorn, the Tiges appeared to loose all interest in the game, and proceeded to let in not one, not two, but three soft tries in the denoument.
Not a good look when a well regarded student of the game remarked over the bush telegraph that the second half represented a chance to "put the fear into the other teams".
Didn't work like that.
SC Sheens would have been filthy as with the last 10 minutes, reminding his charges in no uncertain terms that the game only goes on for 80 minutes, for gawd's sake, and there's no time for a nap, let alone a sleep at
Campbelltown.
You might be mugged, as they were.
The Great Todd "The Refrigerator" Payten played his 250th game [a rarity in league] and threw his weight around well in the early part; happy enough to take the accolades.
One helluva unit who played in the '05 Grand Final and whose longevity has been truly remarkable.
Softly spoken off field and has an admirable long standing policy of never drawing any attention to himself.
Curiously enough his 250th came playing against the team he is now playing with at the same ground as he did in his debut game, when he turned out for Canberra, then coached by Tim Sheens.
Circular circularity at its finest.
With Lote "Wot'd I do Guv?" Tuqiri out with a broken right forearm, as a result of an innocuous first half tackle, until Round 11 at best, and The Try Scoring Freak gorn until Round 16 at the very very earliest [read season ender, for mine], surely it's not another season -- you can pick any one you like from The Drought of '06-'09 -- that is tragically cruelled by injury?
SC Sheens had the proper take on it as quoted in the Sunday fishwraps
'You learn in this game that you've got to get on with it. It would be a waste for Chris if we lose next week … It's very disappointing for the kid and for the team, to lose our left edge tonight. The players have got to come to grips with getting ready for another week.'
Indeed, the "left edge" wiped out in the blink of an eye.
WESTS TIGERS 34. Tries: Lawrence, Utai, Lui, Heighington, Ayshford, Fifita. Goals: Marshall (5).
CANBERRA RAIDERS 24: Tries: Ferguson (3), Vidot, Dugan. Goals: Croker (2).
At Campbelltown Sports Ground.
Crowd: 14,091.
Another bizzare game by any measure and they only have themselves to blame.
Suppose it's as good a time as any in the season to learn the painful lesson that nine times out of ten games of Australian Rules Football are usually won and lost in the Championship Quarter.
That's why it's called the Championship Quarter, doh.
Three goals nine behinds in Q3 is a dead-set coach killer, with most of the bent-wide chances coming from set shots.
Deary me.
No doubt Coach Horse aka Mr Ed would have raised his voice as he told them that to escape with two points from the draw that they narrowly got away with is only half the punishment.
If he had any sense, he would have just got the forwards together on the training paddock on Monday morning and told them they can only go home once they have kicked 50 goals, each.
At the same time, he'd be saying to the Club Secretary "I'm new to this, boss!".
He'd claim tactics and strategy need careful planning, which takes time, and fair enough you'd suppose, but that sort of inaccuracy in front of the big sticks just doesn't wash.
Although there were some encouraging aspects, it's hard to see at this early stage, the Swans being really competitive with the genuine top sides.
And yet there have been a few sharp long time observers of the game who pre-season rated The Red & The White a chance of making the top four.
Mmmm....
Thought the Yoof of Today who the club have recruited over the past couple of years acquitted themselves well.
The likes of Son of Gary, Big Ted, the Haneberry Kiddie, Jetta the Joint Strike Fighter, Rick Shaw, In Like McGlynn, Jesse James White, Reg Grundy, even Spida Jnr on debut, all sparkled from time to time, but still need to learn how to play four good quarters of football consistently to make a major impact, while the veterans and journeymen did what they've been doing year in year out, just getting things done.
Mr Ed would be well aware that he has but one superstar on the roster - who's star is on the wane - and then it's a long step down off The Goodes Train to a handful of players who are capable of out and out brilliance.
Rhino Keefe probably the best among them on the day.
Seems they're going down the right track, but it looms as a rebuilding year in all probability.
There's no substitute for hard won experience, but Jetta's 80 yard solo run from half back flank almost to the full forward square, with no less than five bounces along the way, only goes to prove there's nothing like exuberance.
It doesn't win matches, but it can go a long way.
MELBOURNE: 3.2 5.8 8.12 11.18 (84). Goals: Green 2, Dunn 2, Jurrah 2, Moloney, Sylvia, Bennell, N Jetta, Jones.
SYDNEY: 5.3 7.5 10.14 11.18 (84). Goals: McGlynn 3, J Bolton 3, Goodes 2, Everitt, White, Reid.
At Melbourne Cricket Ground.
Crowd: 33,951.
