L.Franklin (Syd) books T.Cotchin (Rich) for over acting under the AFL Code of Conduct, 27 May 2022, Sydney Cricket Ground.
Hard Nuts,
It was a choice way to
mark the mid-way point in the season -- Buddy Franklin giving
that well known serial pest Trent Cotchin a short arm jab to the
chops. Kapow! Cop that, ya prick. Cotchin, of course, is a well
known serial pest. Only recently he kicked Tex Walker in the
nuts That's all class. He should have been booked for over
acting as he'd been doing it all day. But no, Lance gave him a
touch up and gets rubbed out for a week with the AFL's
Prosecuting QC told to pull his head in with the "flowery
language" lawyer speak down at the tribunal. You don't go around
calling one of the all time greats of game "cowardly" and get
away with it. That's the last time you'll be appearing before
the Three Faceless Men, son, if it requires a grovelling apology
to the great man. Good job there, headquarters. Oh well, it was
a convenient way for The Great Buddwah to take a longer
mid-season break than usual as it turns out, and stay home with
the wife & kids, no need to go to Melbourne. There's some
serious unfinished business to be attended to down there later
on. Some emotional shit happening also as this has to be his
last season, surely? The body is starting to seriously creak
under the strain. Under normal circumstances with the Swans,
it's no Buddy - no cigar. If fact, if he doesn't kick a goal you
can generally call it curtains. Buddy kicking a bag of five
against Richmond is the best he gets these days, and they win
games. So it was pleasing for the long suffering die hard to see
the best team performance Sydney had put on all year, Buddyless.
When the D's kick five goals on you in the opening stanza you
have half an ear open for the faint strains of the Fat Lady
singing already, but to kick 'em off the park in the final
quarter to snatch an unlikely victory two weekends in a row was
pretty sweet home & away heading to the bye. Also allowed
pretty boy Tom Papley, who's been struggling, to do his
excellent chimpanzee impressions, while the Swan's "forgotten
man" Sam Reid picked up the Gold Seiko watch (but took the
Harvey Norman retail bundle in lieu) for Best On Ground. At 8
and 4, the Swans are winning twice as many as they're losing
which should get them there abouts for the double bite of the
cherry in the finals, but they really need a "purple patch" -
five wins in a row - whammo! in the back half of the season, for
mine, if they genuinely want to get serious about a top four
finish, which of course, is a very good place to be, and well
within reach. If other players from losing teams go to
restaurants and start beating the shit out of each other after
getting pissed in the wake of just losing a game they'd banked
on to the Swans, then the Red & the White are home &
hosed, you'd think. The "Sydney System" keeps the players out of
the papers if they get on the grog, and with a good team looking
after themselves and some draft picks really coming on, SC Horse
knows a thing or two about "psych war" from the safe distance of
Sydney. Excellent work, well placed. 8/10.
MELBOURNE 5.1, 7.1, 8.6, 9.7 (61). Goals: Fritsch 3, Gawn 3, Jordon,
Langdon, Jackson. SYDNEY 1.5, 6.9, 6.11, 10.13(73). Goals: Reid 3, McDonald 3, Papley 2,
Heeney, Gulden. At Melbourne Cricket Ground. Crowd: 32,753.
Meantime, over at
Balmain, it was good of the Board to find the time to sack the
coach, in a not so busy mid-season bye fortnight. Michael
"Madge" Maguire, otherwise known as Super Coach Magoo, gets the
chop with immediate effect so he's already had his last game at
Leichaardt. Contracted to the end of 2023, Mr Magoo wasn't
exactly shown the back door without so much as a sausage. He was
sensible enough to go quietly and take a couple of sugar bags
stuffed with bundles of pineapples the club can ill afford with
him. Of course SC Magoo is a scapegoat - all sacked coaches are
- we know that, and giving him the punt covers the arses of a
helluva lot of other ineffectual people. The Club Secretary
should probably join him in the dole queue down at the CES. But
you do have to feel a bit sorry for "Madge" after three and half
seasons, knowing that coaching Souths to the Premiership in 2014
will now never be bettered as his career apogee. Certainly never
a chance with Balmain in their recent and current state of
complete & utter disarray. In truth, and especially this
year, he's had nothing to work with. A seriously under-manned
and under-powered side to begin with, who've been utterly
wracked by injury, been unlucky and accident prone. Balmain's
three star players are all in nowhereseville. The brilliant goal
kicking five-eighth Adam Doueihi hasn't had a game this year
after off-season surgery, the mercurial full- back Dane Laurie
is cactus with a knee mischief, while that monster of a Samoan
second-rower with the wonderful name of Luciano Leilua
is off to Townsville at the end of the season for much better
money ($2.2M/3yrs) at the Cowboys. So, see you Madge, it was
never really was that nice knowing you. A few more wasted years.
Said it before, say it again, but hot damn they're a hard team
to follow.
So, Brett "Noddy"
Kimmorley has been plucked from obscurity, as he's found himself
at a loose end, to be interim coach for the rest of the season.
Noddy was a handy enough half-back in his the day, played for
NSW when required, but more importantly, he was the
quintessential journeyman playing for as many as six different
clubs, filling yawning holes and gaps in teams. Always the stop
gap, he knows he's been handed the poisoned chalice by the
Tigers, but the best he could possibly do is limit the
humiliation of not making the finals for ten years - fuck my
brown dog, Harold - excuse the emotion, but ten long suffering
years without even a sniff at some silverware for the trophy
cabinet. And that's after going through seven coaches in a
decade. With Balmain at 3 and 9, Noddy also has to try not to get into a death fight to
avoid the Wooden Spoon. Poor effort, not good enough. 1/10.
WESTS TIGERS: Bye.
Been there before. Brett Kimmorley, 25 May 2005, for NSW v QLD, Lang Park, Brisbane.
