Money Grubbers,
Imagine everyone's surprise when they opened the Monday morning fishwraps to find Sydnernee leading the comp/top of the table, with an early season purple patch in the offing
Unheard of.
It couldn't just be the long standing Swans policy of providing on the benevolent fund an annex at the club for a retirement home for Aging Oddballs and Misfits, Disgraced or Discarded Full-Forwards from the old school, as well as the Disgruntled and the Bewildered Ruckmen in the the twilight of their careers.
BBB Hall and The Great Spida being classic examples in recent history, with Nick Davis Come To Save Us and Along Came A Schneider rather less successful experiments in the Fruit Loops Dept.
Of the current crop of crocks, Danny Bradshaw - unwanted and unloved at Brisbane after 14 years of loyal service and two premierships, now kicking bagfuls south of the border; Mark Seaby - did nothing in a hundred games for the Eagles, now making something of an impact for the Emerald City; Marty Mattner - did nothing in a hundred games at the Crows, now an integral part of the Swans backline; McGlynn and Kennedy rejected by Hawthorn - but now getting used to the Sydney way of going; who had ever heard of Shane Mumford or Josh Kennedy The Second? not to mention The Great Irishman - the "recruit" of the year, despite having done it all and having nothing to prove.
Might as well spend nothing on experience as it comes free of charge on the promise that the old blokes will be well looked after, as they pass on their knowledge to the green horns
It couldn't just be that The Goodes Train and Rhino Keefe have All-Australian guernsey's written all over them in the early stages, or that a few well credentialled kiddies, Hannebery and Jack just emerging from their rookie years spring to mind, are well and truly finding their feet.
It couldn't just be the Longmire Effect.
SC Roos confesses he has no idea what it is.
The West Coast Weasles turned out to be easy meat in the final paralysis, done and dusted in the Championship Quarter and the final term simply put the fruit on the sideboard in terms of Swans percentage.
But, be buggered and eat my hat at the same time if 28 thousand punters were in.
Well informed spies at The Ground suggested that the new Doug Walters Stand was almost entirely empty, the man and His Dog were on their usual perch in the MA Noble Stand, and there was plenty of room in the cheap seats.
The club probably counted as through the turnstiles members who got waylayed in Paddington pubs and never quite made it to the ground.
Of course the proof is always in the pudding and the Bears [h], Pussies [a], and Puppies [a] to come will sort the men from the boys.
SYDNEY: 3.3, 7.8, 11.9, 17.13 (115). Goals: Bradshaw 6, White 2, Goodes 2, McVeigh, J Bolton, Jack, Mattner, Kirk, Shaw, Kennedy.
WEST COAST: 2.2, 4.4, 6.7, 9.9 (63). Goals: Kennedy 3, Hams, Priddis, Cox, Naitanui, Hurn, Masten
At Sydney Cricket Ground.
Crowd: 28,442.
Did note that a former Club Secretary at Balmain [who took it upon himself for the rest of his life to remind people at every opportunity that he was in charge in the other Miracale Year, '69] Kevin Emery 'Farking' Humphreys popped up in the mid week obituaries as brown bread at 80.
Went to his grave without any legs, by all accounts.
Diabetes does that sort of thing to you.
Humphreys was epitome of the 70's-80's rugby league pooh-bahs, in an era that some people still yearn for as the last years of the "real game"; corrupt as buggery, yet squeaky clean.
How does that work?
Clever not to do jail time, as the Street Royal Commission suggested that he should have.
Convicted of defrauding the Balmain Leagues Club, fined $2000, and given a good behaviour bond in the end, as you'd recall.
Melbourne Storm guilty of fraud?
Probably most certainly not.
But they were taught by experts, and Humphrey's was a consumate master in the art of balancing the various rugby league factions and the "siphoning off" funds, for 'the good of the club', not to mention himself.
Son Stephen, like father, is now the current Club Secretary at Balmain.
Same, same, only different.
"We could have had fifty points put on us"
SC Sheens 25/4/10.
An admission perhaps that while defence is a very admirable thing indeed in the football caper, the team might be on the verge of forgeting how to win.
That'd be for Royce Simmons to work out, and he's probably booked a few sessions in The Room Full Of Mirrors down on the Balmain Road if they can't get over the hump that is Eastern Suburbs this weekend.
It's all very well to put in a heroic 'Anzac' effort and then see it undone by a bomb 8 minutes from stumps.
Bad luck, that.
Funny thing is that the Best Leb in Game is doing a fantastic job in hoeing the row along the advantage line and might get picked for New South Wales at hooker, and the forwards coming behind him in the form of the likes of the Bludnut and The Refrigerator aren't backward in coming forward, and That Try Scoring Freak Lawrence can be relied on to tot up a few points every week, Benji is on song most of the time and Lote "Wot'd I do Guv?" Tuquiri going mad on the wing, and yet winning eludes them.
Perhaps its the imminent return from a badly shattered leg of the Human Wrecking Ball that is the spark that's required??
Still... plenty to like about the Mighty Tiges, as the odds for the JJ begin to lengthen
Penrith is over the cap, obviously, with a couple of players who will probably be named in the Strayan team for the annual NZ clash.
Otherwise, why would you go there?
PENRITH PANTHERS 26. Tries: Coote (2), Jennings, Gordon. Goals: Gordon (5).
WESTS TIGERS 18. Tries: Heighington, Lawrence, Flanagan. Goals: Marshall (3).
At Penrith Stadium.
Crowd: 19,220.
