The Barbers of Balmain

Brave Beserkers,

As you'd no doubt be aware, the merits of opposition teams usually don't rate much of a mention in these highly opinionated weekly diatribes...but there are exceptions.
You've got to hand it to South Sydney.
If you had all the tea in China, you couldn't buy a better team.
They have some huge mobile units in the forwards who put up a better defence than the Atlantic Wall: along with backs who have flair, speed, and prodigous talent to burn in attack.
Their set plays are some of the best in the league; when they pull one off it's more often than not undefendable.
Plus, the Rabbitohs players by and large have that rare ability to think strategically on their feet.
Somehow, no one knows how, their talent scouts are known for picking excellent players with big football brains.
Little wonder punters are clamouring at the doors of betting shops trying to get on Souths going back to back premierships.
Faced with that, the Tiges would be more than happy that they matched the Rabbitohs sheer physicality - and had some moves of their own, that never quite paid off in points.
Balmain could have come close to winning it, had it not been for the unforced error rate which Coach Squeak would have reminded his charges in no uncertain terms bordered on the unforgivable.
All in all, a top-notch game of football - all the skills on show; even a couple of customary stinks between these two sides, complete with some class-act hair-pulling.
Don't let anyone tell you there's no money to be made in hairdressing in Balmain.
They'd be lying.
The Barbers of Balmain have always been known for doing much sought after fancy hair-do's, and they charge like wounded bulls for the priviledge.
In the current climate, they must be making a small fortune off the football team alone.
It was the first time this season that the Tiges appeared on free-to-air television, and you couldn't help but be struck by the wonderful array of bouffants.
Aaron "The Smiling Assassin" Woods hasn't had a hair cut in years, just the odd trim to tidy up the split ends
He looks more and more like the Abominable Snowman, with his wild mop taped to his head with Elastoplast.
You'd run for your life if you ever came across something that in a dark alley at night.
Kevin Naigama sported a beehive, yep, you read right, a beehive, arranged with a match-day bird's nest, perched on top.
At one point during the second half, as he was trying to field a long-kicked, high-ball coming in over the top, Big Kev actually managed to catch the ball with his hair.
Never seen that!
The Boy Named Sue has a coffuire that makes him look for all the world like a Top-Knot Pigeon.
Dreadlocks are also a popular at the moment.
Two Poo has the best set; no doubt to look the part when he finds himself bonging on with his mates after hours.
Most of the old blokes on the team have perfectly sensible hair cuts, and just for the sake of stark contrast, Good Ol' Keefy Gallaway is entirely bald.
The Stats Guru did point out that the current Balmain first grade side looks very good on paper, tip-top in theory, and it's a classic mix of yoof and experience.
In the run-on side on Sunday, Balmain fielded seven players under the age of 23, while the rest of the team are hard-nut journeymen or veteran ol' timers in their 30's.
That's good...the children on the side need to be shown and told...the trap for young players is it looks simple, but to play it at the elite level sure aint easy.
Still, if they escape not having yet another season cruelled by injury and keep close to their best team on the paddock, they could go places.
You never know.

SOUTH SYDNEY RABBITOHS 20. Tries: Walker (2), Johnston, Inglis. Goals: Reynolds (2).
WESTS TIGERS 6. Tries: Farah. Goals: Richards (1).
At Olympic Stadium, Homebush.
Crowd: 23,211.