beyond belief

Frequented the Front Bar at The Local on Saturday afteroon for a quick snifter and to see who was betting on what and why, and so on and so forth.
The Brown Brothers were in, in force, boisterously warming up for the NZ Worriers early evening game in the league.
They needn't have bothered, and would have been upset at the end of the day that they had wasted their time.
Stumbled across The Philosopher in his usual corner looking a touch melancholy and nursing this week's favoured tipple, a double brandy, lime & soda.
He wasn't much in the mood for conversation, witty banter or small talk, as usual.
Until the idea was put to him that the away game at the Gabba was a tip top opportunity for the Swans to at last put away a lowly ranked team early in proceedings, unlike some other heart-stopping affairs this year.
The Philosopher just said "if they don't, I'm going to have a coronary".
And left it at that.
And lets face it, who could have even remotely forseen the Swans leading by eleven, yes, that's right, eleven freaking goals at half-time?!
Or that the Unliest Man In Football [who is currently affecting some kind of primitive caveman look with the full beard], would be pushed forward by Mr Ed from the off and end up being the leading goal kicker out of 12, with three maximums.
The various bookmakers who offer the now apparently shunned and distasteful exotic odds would have been quite happy that the absolute long shot got up.
It seems Roberts-Thomson, who's played his entire career at full back, didn't mind being sent forward for a change, and showed just why he is a very good all around footballer, who adds considerable starch to the line-up.
Never mind the looks; has all the skills.
Few theories have been advanced as to why teams, from time to time, don't turn up to play at home.
The Brisbane Bears being a prime example in this instance.
Most coaches consider it inexplicable.
It's difficult to fathom why a side that's been travelling reasonably well in recent weeks, suddenly finds itself being absolutely monstered at the hands of the visitors.
Swans never led by less than ten goals at any stage after half time.
While the win might have been overwhelmingly convincing, it's one of those games that not much can be learnt from; no moral victory or anything remotely like it - just a ten goal football lesson, "a clinic".
You would have thought supporters of both sides would have left the ground shaking their heads and ascribing it to "just one of those things".
Coach Horse at least could have had a bex and a cup of tea at half time, then a good lie down, knowing the thing was already in the dilly bag, opting as he did to just leave it up to the players to sort it out amongst themselves from there on in.
The 'Best:' line in the scorebox in the Sunday morning fishwraps for the Swans should have just read "All played well".
Bolton, J. is performing his way into Brownlow contention of late, while Odd Head McVeigh had an oustanding game, for mine.
The Hannebery Kiddie had his best outing in weeks, while that old Crows discard Marty Mattner appeared to close down the Brisbane forward line almost single handedly, and then kick some goals at the other end on a whim!
Could have been best on ground.
Dennis-Lane proved to be the serious young insect who did really well roving the ball on the ground, while The Bird flew the coop - never marked/manned up by the opposition all night - and was prominent among the Swans 'loose men everywhere'.
The Goodes Train decided under the circumstances that he didn't need to do anyting more than put in a tradesman like performance and save his aging legs, and did rather well at that.
The season reaches the half way point this weekend, and 5th is not a bad place to be, given the top two are runaways.
The Stats Guru points out that a cursory glance at the run to the flag reveals the Swans [with a perfect away record so far] play five teams also in the current top 8, seven teams outside the 8, plus another bye.
He reckons, on paper, that's a bit better than half a chance of finishing in the top four.
But they really need to string together a purple patch in the next few weeks to be considered genuine contenders.

BRISBANE: 1.0, 2.2, 5.8, 7.9 (51). Goals: Retzlaff 2, Banfield 2, Brown, Clark, Black.
SYDNEY: 6.7, 13.8, 15.9, 17.14 (116). Goals: Roberts-Thomson 3, Goodes 2, McGlynn 2, Mattner 2, Johnson, Bird, Kennedy, McVeigh, Seaby, O’Keefe, Reid, Dennis-Lane.
At Brisbane Cricket Ground.
Crowd: 22,150.

Dropped into the old Orange Grove Hotel on my way to the Spiritual Home on a crystal clear, crisp, Monday evening in the Emerald City just to confirm that they really had ruined it with one of those McPub makeovers/cheap 'renovations' that publicans can buy off the plan.
Such a shame that the fireplace in the original front bar that used to burn top quality old growth forest hardwood for the comfort of patrons in winter has been boarded up.
The Grove used to be a you beaut pit-stop when we walked to the ground from our place in Rozelle all those years ago, but it's not the same, even though the barmaids were wearing cute little Tiger's ears.
Oh well, at least it's not a block of flats...for now.
Found a good standing room only spot in front the grand stand at the swimming pool end, with a perfect view of the Tigers running that way in the second half.
However, it all ended up being rather disappointing in almost every aspect -- the long and the short of it was that Balmain played poorly.
Marshall and Farah did nothing and were missing in action, depriving the side of any attacking spark, while the engine room failed to get going at any stage; hampered by the most spastic refereeing seen at the ground in a long time [and that's saying something].
The filthy Knights played offside all night, continually infringing the 10 metre rule at the play-the-ball, and were then guilty of lying all over the tackled player, so the Tigers forwards couldn't get any go-forward momentum to speak of.
The Bamfords eventually, very late in the game, warned the Newcastle captain that the next player to break either rule would be sent to the sin bin; of course they then stopped doing it, but the damage had already been well and truly done by then.
Why the Bamfords didn't issue the warning from the outset and get control of the game is beyond belief
A case in point of the Bamfords being hell bent on robbing the home side blind was the Knight's second 'try' to level up the half-time score at 10-10.
It must go down in the record books as the joke try of the year.
Saw it with my own eyes as it happpened right in front of me.
The ball clearly went out after landing on the dead ball line - everyone in that corner of the ground obviously thought so, as did the the players, who stopped playing - the pill then miraculously somehow boomeranged back into the in-goal and the Knights player who was scrambling back to try to have a dab at it managed to get one finger on the ball, but at no stage whatsoever was any downward pressure exerted on the pigskin.
All as plain as day viewed in real time in 3D with the naked eye, and yet the mongs in the video referee's box ruled it as a try.
The TV bamfords were fooled by the phenomenon known as parallax error and the fact that television lies - all the time.
Could go on about it, but won't.
As you might have guessed, it's something that gives me, and everyone else for that matter, the complete shits.
The crowd went absolutely ballistic and punters were throwing their hats to the ground in disgust, but realised there was no point in arguing with them as Bamfords only very rarely change their decisions; abuse is much better.
Little wonder the umpires quickly scuttled off the ground like some kind of vermin at full time, under police escort.
Bad luck didn't help either.
Lote "Wot'd I do, Guv?" Tuqiri lasted all of six minutes in his first game back after seven weeks on the sidelines with a broken arm before being taken off after doing an ankle and never returned.
A season cursed.
Then late in the game, the Knights filthiest player, Uate, upended some Tigers youngster in a blatant spear tackle, and wasn't sent off by the Bamfords, as he should have been.
Then he gets a weak-as reprimand down at the judiciary, when he should have been rubbed out for two weeks by rights, on account of his 'good record'.
Go on, tickle my arse with a feather.
Lord, help us
After all that, SC Sheens would have pulled the last tuft of hair out of his head and presented it in a very small glass case to the club museum.
A collective sigh of relief went through the crowd as the full-time hooter blew at 16-16, but just found myself regretting the bad mistake of leaving the heart pills at home.
All was forgiven as extra time turned into an elaborate game of chess, and The Best Leb In The Game potted the field goal early in the tackle count when the Knights were not expecting it, with two minutes left on the clock.
No other football ground in the world makes that kind of noise with a full house in, when the match-winner sails over the black dot.
The Touch Judges put their flags up, and Bob's yr uncle.
The Good Lady Wife got a little carried away and was high-fiving complete strangers, so had no choice but to join in.
Gawd crikey.
Not a good look.

WESTS TIGERS 17. Tries: Fulton, Brown, Lui. Goals: Marshall (2). Field Goals: Farah (1).
NEWCASTLE KNIGHTS 16. Tries: McManus, Costigan, Kaufus. Goals: Gidley (2).
At Leichhardt Oval.
Crowd: 18,021.