Meteorologists,

It’s been a very long time since I have walked into the Sydney Cricket Ground in the rain.
And rain it did -- light rain throughout the game, except for a period in the second quarter where it turned for a while into some kind of eerie twirling, swirling mist, that made it difficult to see the far end of the ground.
Thankfully it never bucketed down, but still enough to get a wet arse, and piss you off.
Unfortunately Bay 28 in front of the Clive Churchill Stand offers no protection from the elements at all.
The sort of day where your copy of The Football Record turns to pulp, your beer gets steadily even more watered down than when it first came out of the tap, and as the goals are hard to come by, and the ball handling error rate goes through the roof in the damp, you sit there thinking what kind of a soggy-arsed fool am I to be paying perfectly good cash to be sitting here, when the home fires are burning?
At least my children had the very good sense to decide they had better offers.
After a first half that was pretty much a waste of time and money, the Swans cottoned onto playing wet weather football after the long break better than the Dockers.
It was as simple as that.
There’s no science, and little art to wet weather football.
At least the Swans started to take notice of me and a bloke a few seats along as we screamed in unison “kick long! kick long!” and “pepper the goal square and hope”.
In the conditions, just bombing the sticks and pleading for a bit of luck from the Bamfords would always pay dividends, never mind that you end up putting through an extraordinary 23 behinds, almost enough to account for the winning margin alone and pay for the goal umpires’ wages.
If you cared enough to have a look at the stats, you’d probably find the Dockers were smacked in the contested possessions and centre clearances.
Thought Along Came A Schneider had a wow of a game, no doubt reminded by SC Roos after being dropped for the Geelong outing, that his contract does stipulate “paid to kick goals”.
Even though he had but the solitary six pointer, it came at an absolutely critical moment in the match, and he was probably the Swans leading behind scorer on the day.
As it was, the Swans allowed the Dockers back into the match with two soft goals early in the final quarter, but soon replied in kind, and then proceeded to shut the game down to good effect.
Both the milestone men O’Loughlin [261 games] and Goodes [200 games] put in one of their better efforts of the year, with Magic finding a little of the old touch and kicking a few goals – although he did fluff a set shot sitter late in the Championship Quarter that could have put the game more or less beyond doubt.
The Goodes Train ruck-roved with aplomb all day.
Hall provided the structure again up front, with Magic picking out his lead every time.
Kirk held the mid field together, as he always does, while Kennelly added his usual starch to the back line in what game time he had.
The prospect of the ugliest man in football, Lewis Roberts-Thompson, returning to the side next week after missing the entire season thus far, is very welcome news indeed.
While all hope of a top four finish still appears lost, a cursorary glance at the fixture list reveals Sydney playing five sides currently below them on the premiership ladder [Carlton, Richmond, Melbourne, St Kilda, Brisbane] in the last eight games.
And the more optimistic among us will remember that two teams in recent times have made the Grand Final from being at 7-7 after 14 rounds; Melbourne (2000) and Carlton (1999).
An aside -- at the start of the season, Vili’s lost the SCG pie contract to Balfours.
In a nice touch of ambush marketing, one of the biggest advertising hoardings in the ground simply read “I wish I had a Vili’s”
And I’ll be buggered if there were 25 thousand in.
While the undercover areas were well populated, there were two whole rows of vacant seats near me, and plenty of unoccupied wet perches everywhere.
The ground never seemed crowded as there wasn’t a beer line anywhere I went, which is highly unusual for the G.
Thousands and thousands of punters must have been hiding in the upper deck bars all day [because you can’t see the playing arena from the concourse level bars], either that, or they counted a whole bunch of members who never even showed up.

SYDNEY 1.6, 4.11, 8.17, 11.23 (89). Goals: Hall 3, O’Loughlin 2, O’Keefe 2, Schneider, Kirk, Schmidt, J Bolton.
FREMANTLE 1.3, 5.3, 6.6, 9.7 (61). Goals: Farmer 2, Pavlich 2, McManus 2, Tarrant, Headland, Thornton.
At Sydney Cricket Ground.
Crowd: 25, 943.

Now this was some crazy kind of game of rugby league, which ended up in something of a mystery, and provided some feisty Friday night television entertainment.
Two early tries down showed how brittle the Balmain defence can be at times, but the old game plan of playing patience while you bash the opposition without mercy, is bound to see the floodgates open in the second half, which indeed they did, with five Tigers tries scored in the space of 20 minutes, including a couple which were just a matter of strolling into the in-goal pretty much unmolested.
Todd “The Refrigerator” Payton had a great match for mine [you don’t see many forwards scoring tries in the modern game] who is growing into the captaincy quite nicely, while what about that man Lawrence?
The toddler has scored a try in every match he’s played this year, and added a couple of extra pieces of fruit for the sideboard this time around.
Both men are rewarding the faith SC Sheens has put in them, in spades.
SC Sheens has an extraordinary track record guessing the future and getting the best out of individual footballers.
While Melbourne and Manly have taken out mortgages on the top two spots, the Tigers are in with a massive chance of a top four finish.
The numbers that matter marry up, but there appears to be some dispute over the scoreboard, as I’ve come across two quite different versions.
You pick the one you like.
In the avalanche, did Dean Collis somehow dream that he scored a try, or did the Beau Boy really go over for two?
I wasn’t counting, so I’m none the wiser.

WESTS TIGERS 42 Tries: Lawrence (3), Payten (2), Flanagan, Ryan, Collis. Goals: Farah (5). Field Goals: Farah (1).
PENRITH PANTHERS 26 Tries: Pritchard (2), Wallace, Lewis. Goals: Youngquest (5).
At Stadium Australia, Homebush.
Crowd: 12,395.

or

WESTS TIGERS 42 Tries: Lawrence (3), Payten (2), Ryan (2), Flanagan. Goals: Farah (5). Field Goals: Farah (1).
PENRITH PANTHERS 26 Tries: Pritchard (2), Wallace, Lewis. Goals: Youngquest (5).
At Stadium Australia, Homebush.
Crowd: 12,395.